"Buffy's Relationship With the Scoobies"

I have something of a problem with Buffy Summers' relationship with her close friends, also known as the Scoobies: 


"BUFFY'S RELATIONSHIP WITH THE SCOOBIES"

I just finished watching the "BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER" Season Three episode, (3.07) "Revelations". I find myself recalling the scene in which the Scoobies revealed to Buffy that they knew that Angel, the souled vampire whom she was forced to kill in the Season Two finale, (2.22) "Becoming (Part 2)", was still alive and she had been keeping his presence a secret from them. Apparently, one of the Scoobies, Xander Harris, had decided to spy on Buffy, due to her secretive behavior and found her kissing Angel.

Now, I realize that they had a right to be angry that she failed to tell them about Angel being alive. The latter had spent the second half of Season Two as their main antagonist, due to his losing his soul. Because of this, he had caused a great deal of problems for them. He had also summoned the demon Acathla in order to bring about the end of the world. Buffy was finally able to defeat him in"Becoming (Part Two)" . . . but not before fellow Scooby Willow Rosenberg had restored his cursed soul.

But . . . God, this scene when the Scoobies had confronted Buffy in "Revelations" had pissed me off! If there is one thing about Buffy's relationship with her Watcher Rupert Giles and the Scoobies that has burned me is that she has allowed them to dictate her behavior and moral compass, due to her own fear of losing their friendship. Has Buffy ever put such pressure on Xander, Willow or Giles? I wonder. For years, they put her on this pedestal called "THE SLAYER" and rarely allow Buffy to be herself or have her own life. 

Xander was the worst offender of them all. I do not know how this character came to be so beloved by the series' fans. Granted, Xander could be entertaining. But of all the characters, he was probably the most self-righteous of the bunch. And he has allowed his self-righteousness, along with his jealousy toward Buffy's relationships with both Angel and Spike to compromise his morals without any remorse. Good examples would be his lie to Willow about Buffy's wishes regarding Angel in "Becoming (Part 2)" and his attempt to murder a chipped Spike in (6.18) "Entropy" for having sex with the fiancee he had dumped at the altar. Even in "Revelations", he was behaving in the most self-righteous manner about Buffy's lie regarding Angel . . . yet, at the same time, was kissing Willow behind his girlfriend at the time Cordelia Chase's back. Some would say that at least his infidelity with Willow was not a threat to anyone. But his and Willow's actions ended up hurting Cordelia in more ways than one. 

The Scoobies' attitude toward Buffy reached its pinnacle in Season Six. In (6.01)"Bargaining (Part 1)", Willow, with the assistance of Xander, his second girlfriend Anya Jenkins and her girlfriend Tara Maculay's assistance, brought Buffy back from the dead . . . without her consent or anything. An act that led to a year long depression for for the Slayer. And they did this, because they needed"THE SLAYER". They believed that Sunnydale needed a Slayer. Despite the fact that Sunnydale had managed to exist without a Slayer for nearly a century before Buffy's arrival. 

Is it any wonder why Buffy began to emotionally distance herself from her friends" in Season Seven?